Down...

Hello dear space and dear friends where ever you are...

I'm sorry but this will not be a happy posting... Some times, and I think most of the times, a lot of us in blogland block ourselves for those down days and not write about them... is not that our life is perfect and happy all the time, is just that we chose to focus on the bright and happy and not tell about the not so happy days...
(by the way, I must be tired and I can't think in English very good right now, hope what I write today makes sense... because I kind of feel it doesn't, like is not well written)

I feel like crying... I don't know why, I've just been down all day.
I had an amazing weekend:: I spend my evening on Friday at the LYS and the same on Saturday afternoon, almost 5 or 6 hours of knitty time with nice ladies... then I had a Saturday date night with my dear MG and he took me out to have sushi for dinner!! Yesterday was a perfect and happy day spent in my pj's with MG around... working on my scrapbook albums, and knitting...

And today.... I don't know, I'm simply not happy... and it's not exactly that if that makes sense...
I'm happy and utterly thankful for all the things in my life... I can't ask for more and my life is pretty much perfect... but I'm also sad.
I don't know if what have is that I'm homesick... I am going to Mexico in 3 weeks (yei!) and I'm really excited about going and spending 2 great weeks with my family... and all the time I'm thinking in how great it'll be and all I want to do in that time... and I'm enjoying so much my life here right now!
I'm finally (luckily) getting to that point where I have things to do, places to go, and people to see... I finally have some friends to hang out with and have lunch or do things together. I've come to know the city and places and I really love this place.

Besides all that, I'm in my best self moment in my relation with MG... I'm totally and completely inlove with him, more deep and stronger than ever!!! and that is absolutely great and makes me really really happy! I love him so so much!

And still, today I just want to cry...
Maybe I'm tired, maybe I'll get sick and my body and mind are down, I don't know... but I feel sad...

I went to the yarn store today because I'd made a mistake in my sleeveless tunic and I needed help... and it was all wrong!!!! I knit continental and I knew that I twist my stitches, but when they analized how I knit, I do 3 things wrong on each stitch... I was making a really (even) dense fabric, with twisted stiches and using a whole more yarn than I was supposed to... and on top of everything, my knitting was not straight (I forgot the way they told me that is called) but my rows of knitting were going to one side instead of going straight down... and I needed them straight down to this project, because otherwise the triangle points on each side of the "skirt" wouldn't be at the sides....

So very sadly we unraveled the whole thing... They said they would teach me the rigth way to do it next time I go to the store.... I came home and looked for continental knitting on youtube, and tried a practice swatch.... it feels like I've never knitted and I'm learning all over again... and as every new student, I put a lot of tension and pressure and now I have pain again in my hands... I had to stop because of it and I just feel so frustrated right now...

So that frustration, added to the crying feeling from before during the day, are not a very good combination....
I have to go, MG is here and we have to go groseries shopping... hope I'll get distracted!

Thanks for reading if you got all the way trought it!

See you soon!
S.