March 07, 2011


Hello dear space and dear friends where ever you are...

I'm sorry but this will not be a happy posting... Some times, and I think most of the times, a lot of us in blogland block ourselves for those down days and not write about them... is not that our life is perfect and happy all the time, is just that we chose to focus on the bright and happy and not tell about the not so happy days...
(by the way, I must be tired and I can't think in English very good right now, hope what I write today makes sense... because I kind of feel it doesn't, like is not well written)

I feel like crying... I don't know why, I've just been down all day.
I had an amazing weekend:: I spend my evening on Friday at the LYS and the same on Saturday afternoon, almost 5 or 6 hours of knitty time with nice ladies... then I had a Saturday date night with my dear MG and he took me out to have sushi for dinner!! Yesterday was a perfect and happy day spent in my pj's with MG around... working on my scrapbook albums, and knitting...

And today.... I don't know, I'm simply not happy... and it's not exactly that if that makes sense...
I'm happy and utterly thankful for all the things in my life... I can't ask for more and my life is pretty much perfect... but I'm also sad.
I don't know if what have is that I'm homesick... I am going to Mexico in 3 weeks (yei!) and I'm really excited about going and spending 2 great weeks with my family... and all the time I'm thinking in how great it'll be and all I want to do in that time... and I'm enjoying so much my life here right now!
I'm finally (luckily) getting to that point where I have things to do, places to go, and people to see... I finally have some friends to hang out with and have lunch or do things together. I've come to know the city and places and I really love this place.

Besides all that, I'm in my best self moment in my relation with MG... I'm totally and completely inlove with him, more deep and stronger than ever!!! and that is absolutely great and makes me really really happy! I love him so so much!

And still, today I just want to cry...
Maybe I'm tired, maybe I'll get sick and my body and mind are down, I don't know... but I feel sad...

I went to the yarn store today because I'd made a mistake in my sleeveless tunic and I needed help... and it was all wrong!!!! I knit continental and I knew that I twist my stitches, but when they analized how I knit, I do 3 things wrong on each stitch... I was making a really (even) dense fabric, with twisted stiches and using a whole more yarn than I was supposed to... and on top of everything, my knitting was not straight (I forgot the way they told me that is called) but my rows of knitting were going to one side instead of going straight down... and I needed them straight down to this project, because otherwise the triangle points on each side of the "skirt" wouldn't be at the sides....

So very sadly we unraveled the whole thing... They said they would teach me the rigth way to do it next time I go to the store.... I came home and looked for continental knitting on youtube, and tried a practice swatch.... it feels like I've never knitted and I'm learning all over again... and as every new student, I put a lot of tension and pressure and now I have pain again in my hands... I had to stop because of it and I just feel so frustrated right now...

So that frustration, added to the crying feeling from before during the day, are not a very good combination....
I have to go, MG is here and we have to go groseries shopping... hope I'll get distracted!

Thanks for reading if you got all the way trought it!

See you soon!


  1. I am so sorry that you are feeling sad, we all have those days where everything just seems rubbish and that is always the day you find that you have a mistake in something you have been making, I had one of those days last week but I really felt a lot better after a hot bath and a good sleep. I hope that you feel better and remember that you have something wonderful coming when you go to visit your family, the knitting will fix itself up, and nothing is ever wrong in knitting it is just different from everyone else's, unique even!!!! Hugs xoxoxoxox

  2. Oh, I so sorry you are feeling sad today. Sometimes things just gang up and blind side you. Just your knitting woes today would have been more than enough frustration for anybody! I hope tomorrow is a brighter day for you.

    Hugs,, Julie

  3. Cheer happens!! Be positive n things will work out fine....keep smiling!

  4. Dear Shanti, we all have that happen to us. The trick is to plow through it and hope for a better day tomorrow. I am also trying to keep my spirits high, but the thought of my daughter and granddaughters leaving me makes me feel like crying... and my mother died last year this time.. and now I've found that my middle son has a brain tumor and has to get brain surgery. But I am trying to stay positive anyway. I hope you have a good time in Mexico. We'll miss you here!

    Hugs, Teresa

  5. Hi. So sorry to hear that you're feeling sad. I hope you feel happier soon.
    Sending you hugs.

  6. So sorry you are sad, Shanti! I am praying for you! ♥ (((hugs)))

  7. Shanti,
    Your honesty is very sweet. Teresa's advice is too true. It is nice to have Blogland to offload to and receive some advice. We cannot feel upbeat all of the time. I hope your 'blues' have passed or are passing. I came back to leave a message about your beautiful crocodile shawl, I think it is fantastic. The texture looks just like scales. I have never seen anything like it. Thank you for your comments on my blog and do try the Pancakes! x How exciting you will be going 'home' soon. How many more sleeps is it until you go? xxx

  8. I sure hope you feel better soon. I really think this a common feeling at times. It's almost like you can't put your finger on it.
    Keep the positive road and keep busy.

  9. Sorry to hear about your "down" day! I hope it didn't last too long... I hate when I start feeling that way, I call it my "funk." That's all I can tell my husband... "I'm in a funk." lol

    That's a shame that you had to tear out your whole project. I don't know anything about knitting, but I do know that it's harder when it comes to fixing mistakes! Good luck with it. :) & Hope you are feeling better.

  10. Hi Shanti..I'm a little late but I wanted to tell you that I really appreciate you being so open and honest..Alot of people feel that way and your so right..we just don't type/talk about it. I call it my FUNK..I get into funks a good bit..I hope your now out of yours and feeling happy and enjoying the good things in life. Hope to hear an update soon! take care! xoxoxo


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